“Bitter Beloved”

It’s been four years now
I have not seen your face
In person
Only in binary images
Living on a page

You look so happy
You fell in love again
With the man you cheated
On a stupid boy with
It’s funny how that works

If only I had
Given all my strength
Then I would not be
Your bitter beloved boy

How far did I fall
When you let go of my
Hand?
I wish I had not been
Your bitter beloved boy

He will protect you
Comfort and consult you
I could never provide it
I was always so selfish
Wanted to have you
But never embraced you

You grew impatient
Sought out something better
Gave yourself to him
Pushed me aside
Yet I deserved it all

If only I had
The courage to give it all
Then I would not be
Your bitter beloved boy

How far did you run
When you let go of my
Heart?
I wish I had not been
Your bitter beloved boy

A broken man now
Still aches and pain
About you
You don’t seem to care now
And that’s for the best

If only I had
The love to give to you
Then I would not be
Your bitter beloved boy

How fast did we burst
When we let go of our
Hands?
I wish I was not
Your bitter beloved boy